Scientists have discovered the human soul and found that it is a horrifying thing.

Researchers at John Hopkins University has made a miraculous breakthrough in the field of medicine, namely, discovering the human soul.

Lead researcher, Dr. Sung Holl, said this in an official statement.

“We started with the idea that people’s “spiritual” condition may adversely affect their physical health. Interestingly, there is plenty of data to support that peoples’ mental states, and the introduction of placebos can alter an individual’s condition. So we took it a step further into the realm normally left to clergy and spiritual leaders.”

What they found was not only surprising but extremely horrifying, said one research assistant.

“It wasn’t a fixed organism, like a heart or a lung. It was an ever moving entity. But it seemed to emit or spew out this….energy. While we couldn’t identify what it was, the attending physician said that he felt it enter him forcibly, boil his insides and then cause him to vomit violently.”

More research has to be done before anything is conclusive. But we are left wondering, what is wrong with the human soul, that it would strike out against anyone of its kind?

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