I wish I could say I’ve never had thoughts like this. I wish I could say it wasn’t mine; it was a suggestion from my friend who is insane. Well, not really insane, just a really weird guy.
I was driving down the street, approaching an intersection. The light changed. No, my thoughts were not to speed up and beat the light. I slowed down. I’ve done that before, everyone has done that before. But, that was not the thoughts I’m ashamed of.
I let off the gas and eased onto the brake, glancing over at the car next to me. There were a couple of guys in the car next to me, a Honda Civic. I noted, based on their skin tone and headpieces, they were likely from an Arab country. They seemed like nice guys. There was no judgement or assumption.
As I turned my eyes back to the front of the car, I saw a poorly dressed man, pushing a shopping cart. It looked as though he had everything he ever owned in it. He was dirty, likely smelly, and didn’t look as though he had a care in the world; not in a blissful way, but in a hopeless way.
My thoughts, my thoughts that bring shame to me even now, were these:
I’d be doing him a favor if I drove him over.