Jiminy Cricket, that cartoon bug from the Pinocchio movie, he used to sing,

“When you wish upon a star, Makes no difference who you are, Anything your hearts desires, Will come to you.”

As a kid, I thought that was gospel truth. Until my 2 grade teacher bust my wish-loving heart with the truth that stars are nothing but balls of gas burning billions of miles away.

Anyways, after my teacher told me the truth, I ran home and cried. All the things I had hoped for, all the things I had wanted, good and altruistic, and pointless and selfish, all of it was a waste. In a bubbler of desperation and pain, I wished once more upon a star.

It was the largest, craziest, all encompassing wish that my little brain could muster. But I didn’t wish on a star. I wished on a passing satellite. It hear my wish, recorded and catalogued it.

12 years later, there was a knock at my door. In my drunken stupor, I opened the door.

“Mr. Felix Faust?”

She took my barely opened eyes as an admission that I was the person she was looking for.

“Excellent. I am Agent Tracy Miller, from Hi-Wi. We are here to make your wish come true.”